home sweet home-ish

got in to manchester earlier today after a long two weeks trying to recall the german i learned in 7th grade, gnome-spotting, public toilets, cheese sandwiches and wearing my favorite jeans to death. getting on a plane full of brits reminded me [again] how much i miss home-home and of the cultural differences between our temporary home and the rest of europe. and the world. god bless cheap carlsberg, public urination, a kabob with chips and the queen.

praha, wien + cesky krumlov

i need to spell check this as it probably makes no sense.. but.. we are leaving to go on holiday again tomorrow morning and i have been feeling under the weather so i am going to bed.

this is the longest post ever. i am writing all this because my memory is horrible and unless i write it all out i will forget, and it was too good to forget. i recomend looking at photos instead of paying attendiont to the essay below.

day one
we left for the train station with plenty of time to spare, as we were not checking bags. after the third train to the airport was canceled due to supposed "signal failure," petey started to get antsy [angry, really.. even agro]. when we finally did get on a train after sweating on four different jam-packed platforms, we sat for a good half hour, ready to throw up. luckily peter was able to call a friend who assured us our flight was, of course, delayed. after getting to the airport ate a celebratory dinner of drugstore sandwiches and flew to prague.

at the airport it took way too long to figure out the ticket machine, even though i had [what i thought were] detailed instructions of how to get into town. luckily no one else could figure them out either. after a bus ride we rode the metro from dejicka station to muzeum to staromistska. Each station had a very 60s themed wall adornment that made an excellent first impression on me. the stations were also spotless.. no vagrant-poos or beer cans or gum seats. and, people do not steam-roll you on the escalator if you have luggage, unlike in the london tube stations.

of course we couldn't find our hostel so we wander around a bit before we found someone to get directions from and checked in to our [again] spotless dorm. after a pee break [the toilet paper in cz is like cheap office paper towel], we asked for suggestions of where to get an inexpensive drink. the man/boy-receptionist was very enthusiastic about a floating latin dance party on the river vltava [moldova in english.. which makes no sense..] but we decided to pass. it was 10-ish at night but still warm and old town was pretty much deserted. we found a cavernous bar where no one was speaking english and had some brewskis. i liked that the czech's enjoy very inexpensive adult beverages and even cheaper cigarettes. we sat, drank and watched the table of men across from us as they bought a bottle of vodka, some glasses and a couple of small mixies. after get yawny we searched for any open shop to get some snacks. after lots of slow walking and looking up at giant doors and windows with nouveau decorations, we found an "all the time" store with pretzel sticks. we continued to walk and stare and snack until we found our way back into the main square and went to bed.

day two
on the suggestion of a friend of a friend, we ate breakfast at zanzibar in prague 3. i had baguette, blue and brie cheese with fruits and petey had baguette, eggs and veggies [which just turned out to be lettuce. ha!]. and coffee. after we went to the tv tower, a space-aged looking silvery antena featuring a very creepy and fantastic planet-ish sculpture of [giant] babies scaling the outside. it was surreal and excellent. we took an elevator to the pastel-colored observation deck and got to see a panarma of pastel-colored prague. next we wandered through a park, past the national museum and bought our train tickets to vienna at the main train station, hlavni nadrazi, which looked like it had been bombed out, but was still beautiful, like all the buildings in prague are. then we drooled over everything at the muncha museum. the best things were photos of naked-ish modeling ladies in muncha's paris studio that he used as reference for his paintings. they were, of course, all gorgeous.

lunch was at beas, right next door to the hostel. yummy indian delisciousness, then a walk down to the river and some time in the shade cooling off and resting our feet before we went for beers [sour cherry and green nettle] and snacks [fried cheese and smoked herring] at pivovarsky brewery. more walking, passed by rudolfinum hall where we could hear the philharmonic orchestra practicing then through the jewish quarter to alberts where we bought a dinner of grocery store baguette sandwiches, then ate them in old town square and torrist watched. i know that after that we went back to the hostel to shower and.. the rest we forget.

day three
walked over charles bridge to eat at bohemian bagel which was alright. it had a fun spiral staircase to the bathrooms. i think that was the best part. then climbed a gazillion stairs to see the castle and tons of tourists. escaped to the almost empty letna park with lots of shade trees and views of town. the best part was a giant metronome sculpture atop a stone fascad, covered in graffiti, complimented by a power line with a collection of dangling sneakers. apparently a giant statue of stalin once stood atop the monument, but it was blown up in the 60s. it was by far the coolest/strangest thing we saw. kept walking towards the mysterious "yellow market" in prague 7. we figured out that the "yellow" was for asian.. very un-p.c., very, very terrible. it had some goodies.. like the cheapest gelato imaginable, death stars and the most mock-crocks i've ever seen in one place. we bought some sour cherries from the farmers market and walked back towards the park, taking lots of water and sit-down breaks along the way. ended up back at beas

day four
checked out of the hostel and ate more bagels with veggie cream cheese and had lates at the bake shop. cutest bakery in the world. got an extra bagel for the road and toured the jewish quarter, temples, monuments, cemetery and lots of prague-specific history. also saw a few very cute and very old volunteer ticket-checkers. they made my morning. afterward we went on the interweb and ate the extra bagel in the hostel before heading out to catch the train to vienna. it was packed with tourists. packed with tourists who were sweating and fanning themselves and miserable. it was hot but the sights were mostly excellent. we passed several naked swimmers, adorable baby deer, lots of sunflower and corn fields and other tiny towns and communities. we were already irritable because of the heat [and forgetting to fill up our water bottle] and the company made it worse. we were sat near to two canadian sisters, an older, unrelated canadian woman and another younger girl from some other eastern european country. the euro girl was asking them about canada.. what is a traditional canadian dish [poutine and tim hortons were the first things that came to my mind], what was the weather like, etc. the conversation turned to how canadians had a good sense of humor and could laugh at themselves, unlike americans. how americans don't have to take world history, only have to know how to find their state on a map to graduate high school and how american news does not cover international events. who knew the most anti-american people we would come across so far would be canadians. geez. anyhow, after the hot train we took showers at our night club-ish hostel and gulped beers and ate dinner at a turkish restraunt. afterwards we walked around and saw all the sights lit up at night. we also walked through the museum quarter where tons of hipsters were drinking gocery store beers and lounging on the giant purple louge/sculptures. i was jealous. after more walking, buying a very overpriced bottle of water and walking along the danube where there were many outdoor pee-ers, we found a bar and had drinks, then slept.

day five
rose early and ate pretzel breadsticks and pineapple yogurt drinks from the grocery store. so yummy. went straight to the eating baklava from naschmarkt [flea/veggie-market] and looked at old treasures and an excellent selection of produce, sweets and snacks from what seemed like all over europe. bought some bakalava and ate in in the museum quarter as a replacement for our morning coffee. next we decided to go to the albertina as it supposedly has the largest collection of european art in austria including lots of mark rothko. and it is in a giant gaudy palace. sounds excellent, but it was all a lie. after climbing a scary-ish staircase in the hotness and paying 7.5euro each, we found a hundful of restored, original palace rooms, one room full of paul klee, which was good, and a handful of empty rooms where the permanent collection should have been. it was a bummer. after that we ate our pain away at the tiny indian buffet the is vego. they had the most excellent deep fried sandwhiches with dosa filling. dipped in raita i could have eaten them all day.

the weather turned poo-ish so we took the bus up to the small town of grinzing. it was deserted. petey had a pee in a very suspeicious looking public toilet with funny warning stickers then we took another bus up even further to kahlenberg hill. there were some vineyards, a hotel or two, a shop and a scenic overlook. it was overcast so it was not so scenic. took the bus back to town and got stuck in a rain storm on our way to check out the crazy housing project, hunderwasserhaus. we made it almost all teh way there on foot before we gave up and went into a cafe to have some lates. it was a cute little place with old ladies drinking wine in the corner. we paid a ridiculout 5.6euro for two of the tinest lates i have ever seen. they were good, but if i pay 4$ for 4ounces of liquid it better be drugs. or booze. so after the rain let up we saw the hunderwasserhaus and went off to eat an early dinner of the most deliscious pizza at vesuvio de mario. it made us very happy and it was incredable inexpensive. we were so happy that i carried the leftovers around all night and after some outside beers [back in the museum quarter] we ate the leftovers on the walk home. having a purse that smells like pizza is wonderful.

day six
it was our last day in vienna we tried to find somewhere to have a real life eggs/toast breakfast. the diner that we wanted to go to was closed for the month. instead we went to a place that we thought was a diner but was really a night club.. it was described as the place to go if it is morning but you're not done clubbing. we were the only patrons. we drank 3euro lates and watched the giant, eastern-european bouncer play the fruit machine and dance to michael jackson songs. it was strange. we ended up eating yummy cream cheese, pepper, tomato and cucumber sandwiches from anker then visiting the MUMOK. this was the best museum of the trip and the best i've been to period. one exhibit included some very impressive coverage of 60s performance art and alternative architecture/lifestyle technology [that is the best description i can come up with]. lots of things that looked like they came straight out of a spacey 60s movie, in the best way possible. it was amazing.

it was hot and clear and gorgeious out so we took a long stroll, wandering towards vegatasia, well out of the city center. they had a giant, all veggie buffet with things i have never seen at eaten before, and they were all good. our favorite was desert.. deep friend pineapple chunks and coconut rice pudding. it is my favorite combination. it tastes just like suntan lotion smells. we were in such a good mood we went out to prater park, a carnival/amusment park. there were at least four different variations of bumper cars, the best being americna themed. there was an air brushed picture of a biker with a confederate flag and large-boobed lady on the back. it was hillarious. we stood and listened to a very enthusiastic carnival announcer for a good five minutes. something about a german accent gets me every time. there were at least 5 beer gartens and scary sculptures of children eating their way out of ice cream cones. we bought some beers to go and went to danube island. i am pretty sure we were the only tourist there. everyone was relaxed and having bbqs, swimming, boating, rollarblading and sun bathing along the river. we picked a spot near the water and drank beer until the sun went down. for dinner we ate a traditonal vienese pub. petey had fish and potatoe salad that was vinigary and delisious and i had a dumping filled with sausage and surrounded by saurcraut. we were so full that we tried to walk around but were also so tired we couldn't. after trying to drink beers in voksgarten we had to dump them out and go to bed.

day 7
ate more veggie samiches from anker and drank more pineapple yogurt on the way to the train station. took the train to a very deserted gmund then another, tiny one-car train [back into czeck territory] to cesky budejovice. we saw more excellent cz countryside, sunflowers, naked swimmers and deer. along the way the tiny train made quite a few stops to pick up people along the track, even though they were not always at stations. most of these were cute old men. when we got into town we had to catch a bus from the main shopping center.. after walking in circles we realized the bus station was on top of the shopping center and not underneath. the bus ride was smooth and scenic and when we got to cesky krumlov we were happy to be off public transport. our hotel is krumlov was called krumlov house and was the opposite of the wambat hostel we stayed at in vienna, which was good. there were no pool tables, no bar and no drunk americans/australians boozing it up. instead we were told there were no shoes allowed [i never even went barefoot in my own apartment!] and that the river was really dreamy. i don't mind as i am getting old and would much rather deal with hippies than drunken backpackers. and we were pooped from all the wondering and hot weather. so, we sat right on the river on ate a yummy veggie-ful dinner at laibon. afterwards we explored the almost deserted castle, courtyard and gardens. we ended up getting locked in the gardens with some italins, czecks and some other people who didn't speak english. we were all confused but eventually some guy with an impressive euro-mullet came to let us out and laugh at us. later we went to the horror bar, known for being spooky at night, and drank frankova wine. there were some skelatins hanging from the ceiling and a few coffin tables. people kept coming through to take photos and leaving without buying any drinks. it was odd. the scariest thing about the horror bar was the music. i don't know what it was but i was terrified.

day 8
bought bagels and cream-ish cheese and hiked up to the monestary. on the way we met many giant snails and slugs. it was like olympia natl. park all over again. we tried our best not to smooh any but it was a very uphill climb and i think i got too delerious to care about half way up. after the hike we wandered and bought groceries for a picnic. we made sandwiches and drank wine by the river and watched the canooers go by. it was excellent. wine in the afternoon is the best. next we climbed the castle tower. it was slightly more scary than it should have been, as we had been sitting in the sun drinking wine just before. there was good panaramic view and we could even see the monestary where we were earlier that morning. after we got back down we headed back into the gardens and visited the reflecting pond. petey took senior pictures of me. we watched the ducks chase eachother. after more extensive wandering we bought some beers from the brewart for later and ate bohemian feasts at two marys. it was lots of potatoe and other assorted goodness. then more wandering along the river. we sat for a while listening to some guy play classic rock covers on the piano. it was funny and entertaining. highlights were stairway to heaven and bohemian rapsody. then more wandering. lots of it. then drank our beers back at the hostel where petey plated guitar and i read rick steves. we were getting sleepy so in an attempt to extend the night we went to nearby bar bar. it was literally around the corner. but it was empty. there was the bartender lady and an old man she was chatting with. that was it. and they only had one beer on tap. and it poured incredable slow. must not get much business. being in there made me even sleepier so we went back and slept.

day 9
the shower smelled of pee and i realized i was not wearing shoes and then i freaked out. then i saw a spider and it was all over. i put flip flops on in the hostel. made sandwiches for the leftovers from the picnic the day before and brought them along for lunch on another hike. we didn't know where this one went [as the name was in czeck] but it ended up being a horse riding stable. luckily the walk was not all uphill, only mostly uphill, but pretty. we stood in the corner of the farm field and ate our sandwiches. it was strange but good. then headed back into town for a few more hours of wandering and had italina for lunch. homemade gnoccis and pizza. then ice cream bars from the grocery store. yummm. then back on the bus and into prague where we caught the metro and another bus to the airport. here we are the only bad meal of the entire trip. 15-ish euro for a [unimpressive] baguette sandwich, small greek salad and yogurt drink. then stood in line waiting to check in for our flight. the brits behind us wouldn't shut up and it made me remenice about how pleasant it had been not hearing any [well, many] garbled or hen-ish british accents for ten days.

the end.